Misery of being unknown

Brought back to the
misery of my childhood
the feeling of being small
inadequate
set up to fail
feeling low, unknown and alone
the depression settles in
and I wear it so well
feeling far from love
wondering if i will ever
feel it again
dyer need of a companion
and I don't understand
this time of waiting
dragging on
so behind in my life
of any dream
this can't be my state
for any longer
I can't survive it anymore.

Copyright [July 13, 2006] By: Tiffany Conner

STILL LIVING

The anxiousness
has finally died down
I'm floating in the water
sun shining on me
and I am begging for the strength not to sink

A time where i have to tell myself
to be positive
and resist the jerk
of a long awaited cry

The test of time
has shown me who cares enough
to hold onto a friendship
as the few i cling to
truly know my weakness
and my pain

I'm still breathing
still smiling
still living
my longing
will one day be fulfilled

And the more i cling to the ONE
who can calm my heart
ease my thoughts
the more i will learn to trust

to trust
and look beyond the wounds
let the damage
strengthen me
my scars
proof of all the hurt
reminding me
there is better for me.


Copyright [May 27, 2006] By: Tiffany Conner